So I’m doing a screening for eating disorders over the phone tomorrow morning. I’m really nervous about it. I hope that they listen to me and place me in the right program to fit my need.
I also used the infared sauna today. It really seemed to help me with depression and motivation. I put on a sound bath too while I used it and that seemed relaxing to me.
I am worried about my husband, though. He just told me that he’s been out of breath all day. I really hope that he isn’t getting walking pneumonia from me, or something else even. We’re going to watch his symptoms and go to the doctor if need be.
The other thing that I haven’t talked about in my blog yet is that a few weeks ago I just stopped talking to my parents. I basically got tired of their abuse and their drama. Things have been rough since then but I feel like I’m able to see problems in my life more clearly already with just a few weeks of space from them. Such as, realizing that I might have an eating disorder. So I think that giving them space has been really good for me. I also feel like I’m having better communication with my parts.
So even though I’m struggling with depression and grief I feel like I’m making progress. Tomorrow I have four appointments, and between those appointments I’m going to do a half hour of trauma sensitive yoga that I found on youtube, revise my book, and try to take Maggie for a 10 minute walk. If I don’t feel well enough to take her for a walk, or if it’s raining hard, I’ll do agility training with her indoors. That’s what we’ve done for her exercise the last two days.
So I think I can do this thing called life. I’ll take it slowly, but I will get there. Eventually I’d like to learn to become a trauma sensitive yoga instructor on top of being an author. But first I need to take care of myself for awhile.
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