I’ve been kind of anxious for a few days now because I’m seeing my new Lyme Literate Doctor today. She might start me on treatments for Lyme disease, which I heard can be brutal (the treatments consist of strong antibiotics, which I never do well with, and can cause a reaction called herxing/die off). I just hope that if I start treatment that the side effects don’t cause me to fall back on any of my goals, such as doing yoga every day, walking 6000 steps a day (about 30 minutes a day of walking), and writing or revising 4-5 pages of my books a day. I know that I’ll get really frustrated and anxious if I can’t maintain this schedule, so hopefully the treatments don’t make me too sick. I really don’t do well with resting and sitting around all day, it makes me depressed.
I am discovering, though, that I like slower forms of yoga as well as Vinyasa and power yoga. For some time, I’ve been doing mainly Vinyasa yoga. But, I’m trying a sunrise series on Gaia and am learning to like Hatha as well. This is good because if I do react to the Lyme treatments, I’m going to need to do more gentle practices like Hatha and Yin. So that’s a plus that I’m learning to like less intense forms of exercise.
I’m still struggling with quite a bit of exhaustion these days. I know that part of it is due to my physical health issues, but I also think that some of it comes from the stress of having such severe DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder) and PTSD, as well as anxiety. It seems as though I have hundreds of parts who are all highly anxious individuals, and they sometimes all get anxious at once, which can throw me over the edge easily. That’s part of the reason why I like yoga so much, is that it helps to reduce my anxiety.
Another thing I’m learning in regards to DID is that I need to learn to work with the other parts. I feel like we’ve kind of been in this, each man for his own, sort of thing for the past few years, and it isn’t working out great for us. I think that we need to work together more as a system if we want some stability in our lives. Our counselor is helping us to do this.
The other thing that’s going on in my life in regards to yoga is that I’ve decided to do a few months of private yoga lessons. This week I’m interviewing different instructors in the area and am trying to find a good fit. I interviewed one woman yesterday who seemed really nice and have another consultation on Thursday. I’m hoping to progress my practice a little through private lessons.
Thanks for reading! Feel free to comment below, and thank you for following me.