I’m actually not sure about what to write today. Lately, I’ve been keeping to myself a lot, meaning that I haven’t been on Facebook as much. The groups I’m in, especially the Leaving AA/Deprogramming groups, sometimes give me ideas about what to write about, but since I haven’t been visiting them as much, I’m a bit out of ideas.
I did see that a neuroscientist is tackling addiction through the use of brain stimulation. Good! We need more scientifically backed ways to overcome substance use disorder rather than the antiquated pseudo-science cult of AA (as I type this I think, God I can’t believe that I went there for so long). Hopefully, more efforts will be made to make scientifically sound and effective treatments for people with use disorders. Right now the treatment industry, which is mostly 12 step based, is failing quite badly when it comes to success rates (which of course they blame on the “addict/alcoholics” themselves rather than accept responsibility for their failings). I think that the success rates of modern treatment centers are only 20%, and AA is no more effective than no treatment at all.
Anyways, I’ve thrown out these statistics in my blog before, but it’s probably time to do them again.
In my own life, I’ve been creating new routines for myself. Routines are important for me because I have autism and ADHD. Every day, M-F, I write a blog, write 5 pages in my latest book (or revise 5 pages if needed), exercise, color, work on some sort of puzzle or brain game, play with my dolls, take care of the cats, clean, and cook dinner. It sounds busy, and it is. I’ve found that this schedule too is helpful to all of the parts. I also want to throw in a half an hour of music a day as well. I might start that today.
Yesterday I still had muscle aches from the flu shot but was able to get all of those things done, and organization my medications in their holder as well. It was a productive day!
I can’t believe how much more awake I am mentally since I left AA. I was in such a fog, and so very miserable during the end of my time there. The happiness that I felt lasted about a decade, and then suddenly just started to turn the other way. I was very deeply depressed, and am still recovering from that. Also, I suffered from really bad dissociative symptoms that are getting better now. I’ve read that this is all common in healing from being in a cult.
Thanks for reading! Feel free to comment below.