On Friday night (in the middle of the night), some parts and alters started coming out. As I child, I thought of these parts as nicknames for myself, but as an adult I’m realizing that they are more than that. It’s always exhausted when they finally surface after years of being repressed. Usually, a bunch of energy comes with it along with all kinds of emotions. So of course, the whole procedure is really exhausted, as well as trying to get them stabilized. Plus, since they showed up in the middle of the night, I didn’t get much sleep on Friday, and I’m still recovering from that.
It’s really hard to go through this process again and again, but I know that it’s good that the parts feel safe enough so that they no longer feel the need to hide and that I feel safe enough so that I don’t feel the need to repress so much. Still, it’s hard enough to try to manage with all of my current parts, let alone some new ones.
I’d like to rest today but I have things to do. My plan is to get them done and then rest over the weekend. I did get my most recent tests results back and I still have active mono, so it’s important that I rest. I don’t know if I’m going to exercise or not today. If I do, it might be lighter exercise, like simply walking for half an hour on the treadmill or something.
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