David and I are working hard at cleaning our house today and sorting through things that we don’t need. Our house is very cluttered, and we are getting some new furniture so we need to get things taken to second hand stores. I worked today on this for about two hours, and David just told me that we have more to do still.
I really want to work out on top of this but am not going to because I have to pace myself. Part of having an illness that produces chronic fatigue and pain is pacing. What this means is that even though I feel like I have a lot of energy today (which I do), I need to make sure not do overdo it, because if I do, I could suffer from something called post-exertion fatigue, which is common in chronic fatigue patients and a lot of people who have auto-immune diseases and such like myself.
It can be really frustrating when I have a lot of energy and want to do things but have to hold myself back, especially because some days I don’t have a lot of energy. But, I do it anyways.
The good news about today is that some accessories and clothes came for my new baby doll, which is a toy that I bought for my littles (child parts). We played with the doll earlier and dressed her up in a cute outfit.
The baby doll that I have is about 15 inches and is just a regular doll. Part of me, though, wants to get a reborn. Part of the reason for this is because I can’t have kids for numerous reasons, and I’ve heard that childless women sometimes love reborns. For now, though, I’m happy just dressing up a baby doll. It might sound weird, but it works for me and my littles.
You know, I always wanted to have kids and be a mother. I was really heartbroken when back in 2014/2015 I had two different doctors tell me not to have kids. It’s taken me years to adjust to this reality and to accept it.
The other thing that we could do in terms of satisfying my motherly instinct too is to foster a dog. I’d like to adopt one, but we think that fostering might be the better way to go. I’ve talked before on here about how we’ve looked into Old Dog Haven in terms of adoption, where you adopt or foster a senior dog. We also recently ran across an organization that fosters abandoned, neglected, or abused dogs.
My concern with getting a dog though is my cats’ health. They get stressed easily, and because a couple of them are ill right now (Patrick with cancer, Lucy with pancreatitis), I don’t want to stress them. So, probably the reborn/doll is a better idea for us.
Lucy got rechecked for cancer last week and is still cancer free, but has pancreatitis. He’s been vomiting and having troubles eating, but is going okay. I’m still very worried about him, though. Patrick’s symptoms come and go. He’s getting along okay.
Overall, life can be stressful at times, but I’m doing okay. I’m glad to be where I’m at in life today.
Thanks for reading! Feel free to comment below.